Today I found the song “Pretend” by Lights by landing on Lissy Elle’s photostream. The funny thing is her voice reminds me of mine and the song reminds me of one I wrote back in High School. Makes me realize that I need to record my songs before every song reminds everyone of something else they’ve all heard before.

Basically I brought that up because the song initially makes me think of where I’m headed which is a giant question mark in the midst of a road with nearly a million forks. I was talking to Mr. Dyer the other day after class and we started talking about schools and whether or not I would like to make a career out of this wonderful realm I have immersed myself in for the past few years. He told me about a school in Kansas that he was asked to visit in order to evaluate their Photography program. When I asked him about Texas State he said that he didn’t know about their program but that UTSA is all fine arts geared and I realized that Texas State seems to be also. Which means that I might need to find a new school to head to if I want to graduate with more than a degree focused in fine arts. Which made me start thinking about Kansas. I can’t even afford to move out of the house let alone to another state. Though, I do have another year to get my act together (do you know how many years I’ve been saying that?). That was when I realized that Kansas might be nice. A new state, a new place. I’ve been itching to get out of Texas since my Freshman year of High School. An itch which has nearly grown into a flesh wound. A flesh wound which overrides the panic and anxiety of life causing me to fear living too far from the comfort of home and move somewhere far, far away to fully fuel my enflamed heart. Though in all honesty if I had to go anywhere it would have to be Washington. The thought of being surrounded by trees and cool weather, just hours away from Canada and California. In the end, as usual, who really knows. All I can really do for now is breathe and get through the end of this semester without pulling my hair out. Actually, now that I think about it, maybe moving out of the state would be good for me. It would force me to get off my butt and start making money, start thinking about living on my own, start working towards something. However, I can talk and plan all I want, in the end all that matters is my actions and what I actually accomplish….Maybe the Summer that I graduate I’ll drag everyone on a road trip up to Washington. Then I can figure out what exactly I want to do. Or maybe this Summer, or this next Winter break. Who Knows.